Goblin Slayer, Vol. 3 Read online

  “It would never work.”

  “…It’s… Adventuring women, you know…” Female Knight seemed to be trying to answer his objection. But her face was red, and she couldn’t quite look at him. She could barely get the words out, very unlike her usual self. “I mean, there aren’t…a lot of interested guys out there.”

  “Is that so?”

  Goblin Slayer tilted his head.

  Female Knight, at least, struck him as quite pretty.

  Her lovely golden hair. Her almond eyes. She had beautiful facial features, too, and her skin seemed smooth. If she put on a dress, she could pass for a noble’s daughter.

  But she only answered, “Yeah, it is.” And so it must have been.

  “Think about it. Guy adventurers always end up marrying princesses, or some village girl they rescued.”

  “So I hear. I cannot speak from experience.” Goblin Slayer inclined his helmet slightly.

  He recalled hearing such stories from books when he was a little boy.

  The knight slew the dragon and rescued the princess. He took her back to his castle, where he refused the kingship and instead traveled far away.

  And in a far, strange land, he married the princess and founded a new country.

  “Well, take my word on it.”

  Goblin Slayer had the same serious tone he used when solving riddles. “So? What about it?”

  “Well, what do you think happens to all the leftover female adventurers?” Female Knight’s expression was despondent and grim.

  “Hm,” Goblin Slayer muttered, crossing his arms. “Perhaps they could marry one of their companions.”

  “I know plenty of parties that broke up when love got in the way and the situation got to be unbearable.”

  “Terrible tales.”

  Indeed. Goblin Slayer spoke of the topic with great gravity.

  He had seen more than a few parties with many women in them, but keeping them together was a task.

  Although, he had also heard that parties of only women often got along quite well. He seemed to recall hearing some such thing from an Amazon once upon a time.

  He hadn’t figured it would be of any particular benefit in goblin slaying at the time, but on reflection he wished he had asked for details. After all, he now had two women in his party. So the stories hadn’t been as irrelevant to him as he’d thought.

  “Then find a husband who is not an adventurer.”

  Anyway, right now he had to talk to the person he was with. Goblin Slayer offered what he thought was a practical suggestion.

  But Female Knight gave him a smile with despair fit for the end of the world.

  “You really think any guys are out there waiting for a girl who can take down a troll or a dragon with one swipe of her blade?”

  “Aren’t there?”

  “…Well, what would you think of a woman like that?”

  “That she must be quite reliable.”

  “…Never mind,” she said, giving Goblin Slayer a dubious look and a deep sigh. “Personally, I don’t really have any interest in non-adventurers, but…” The normally implacable knight shuffled from one foot to the other, unsure where to rest her gaze. “…Maybe it would pay to seem just a bit less…tough.”

  “Yes.” At this point, Goblin Slayer finally began to put the pieces together.

  That thickly armored fighter in her party—Heavy Warrior.

  Goblin Slayer pictured the chiseled face of a man always taking care of the youngest members of their group.

  “Is it him?”

  “…Yeah.”

  Female Knight answered with the slightest nod, the picture of an innocent girl.

  Wait…

  Goblin Slayer let out half a breath.

  He had always taken her to be older, because of her measured demeanor, but perhaps she was younger than he’d realized.

  Well, so it went.

  “I thought love among party members made things unbearable.”

  “There’s exceptions to every rule!”

  “I see.”

  “…Hey, uh, Goblin Slayer… It kind of kills me to ask you this, but…” Female Knight gulped, and this seemed to embarrass her afresh as she flushed red. “If I… If I wear something like that, do you think it’d get his attention…?”

  “I confess I must doubt the sanity of anyone who would ask me that question.”

  “Urg…”

  Standing in front of the bikini armor, Female Knight found herself at a loss.

  As an unwavering wall in combat, she wasn’t used to taking a critical hit.

  “If you want to launch a surprise attack, you need to change it up.”

  “…Huh?”

  It would have been a discredit to her role as a tank if the unexpected statement was enough to stun her, though. She doubtfully shifted her stance.

  “Trying similar things again and again will have little effect. At least, in goblin slaying.”

  “…I’m not asking about goblin slaying.”

  Female Knight glared at him in exasperation.

  Goblin Slayer crossed his arms. He thought, then he continued dispassionately.

  He really had nothing to draw on but his own experience.

  “You’re talking about clothes. You normally wear armor. So get away from that. Wear civilian clothes.”

  “Er… C-civilian clothes…? …O-okay. I’ll think about it.”

  “I see.”

  “Yeah. Um…sorry for the strange question.”

  “I don’t mind.” Goblin Slayer shook his head. “We’re colleagues.”

  That caused Female Knight to blink.

  She wasn’t ready for that, it seemed. She stared intently at the grimy helmet, and then her face relaxed.

  “…You’re a strange, stubborn weirdo.”

  “I see.”

  “But it turns out, you’re not a bad guy.”

  That was her surprise attack. She smiled.

  “See you,” she said brightly, and left Goblin Slayer standing there, speechless.

  §

  “Keh-heh-heh! How about that? I think she likes you.”

  Goblin Slayer found the papery laugh’s source, the master of the workshop.

  How long had he been listening? The old man, short enough to be mistaken for a dwarf, came out into the shop.

  Goblin Slayer moved his recent exchange to the back of his mind, striding boldly up.

  “I want to make an order. Stakes and—”

  “Think I couldn’t hear you? I’ve got it all ready here. You, boy, bring out the goods!”

  “Yessir!”

  The apprentice quickly obeyed his master. He carried stakes, wire, and all to the counter.

  “Thank you,” Goblin Slayer said, and began to inspect the items.

  Some items had to be ordered at this workshop, but others they already had in stock from somewhere or other.

  Now with everything he needed, he tucked the items under his arm. He propped the shovel against his shoulder, then hung everything else from it in a bundle.

  Adventurers quickly learned how to pack everything into the smallest possible space.

  “You done a pretty good job making yourself popular here over the last five years, haven’t you?”

  Goblin Slayer pulled his purse out of his pack, letting some coins clatter onto the counter.

  The master counted them out with a beefy finger, sliding them across the flat surface. His eyes narrowed in his wrinkled cheeks.

  “Have I?”

  “Y’have.”

  “I see.”

  “Yep.”

  The old man smirked, as if recalling an embarrassing bit of history about a relative.

  “When you came in here, some fifteen-year-old kid who wanted cheap equipment, I figured I’d never see you again.”

  “As the most cost-effective approach, it was the appropriate choice at the time.”

  “True, and I thought you might upgrade one day. But you kept wearing those items o
ut and getting new ones.”

  “Would it kill you to buy a decent sword every once in a while?”

  Goblin Slayer didn’t reply.

  He knew this was all the equipment he needed for slaying goblins.

  Even if there had existed an enchanted sword just for killing goblins, this adventurer probably wouldn’t have used it.

  “Ah, well.” The master leaned against the counter like an old man tired of his own foolishness. “In the mood to buy anything else today? I’ve got something just a tad unusual.”

  “What?”

  “A Southern-style throwing knife.”

  “Oh-ho.”

  Goblin Slayer’s reaction didn’t escape the master’s notice.

  “Got your attention, have I?” the old man said with a bold smile. He didn’t wait for an answer before he turned around.

  He took a strangely shaped knife from a shelf and set it on the counter with a solid thunk.

  It was a most unusual dagger.

  The blade split outward into three stems, each bent like a branch. It didn’t seem intended for typical hand-to-hand combat. The only way to use it would be to throw it.

  But it was clearly a knife—in other words, not a very formidable weapon.

  “Little invention of mine. What do y’think?”

  Goblin Slayer took the twisted weapon in his hand. He took a stance, made a few casual swipes, and finally nodded.

  “Goblins would have trouble imitating it.”

  “Anyone would have trouble imitating it!”

  “…What are its advantages?”

  The master frowned. But despite his taut features, he went on happily, perhaps enjoying the opportunity to discuss his weapon.

  “I know what it looks like, but it’s really a sword.”

  His finger, rough from years of working the forge, pointed to the three blades.

  “It spins when you throw it—for stability, and to make it go farther. It’s more for cutting than stabbing.”

  “So are Eastern throwing knives.”

  “Those are piercing weapons. Low-quality piercing weapons.”

  “I see.”

  Goblin Slayer ran his finger along the windmill-like blades.

  It looked passable, at any rate. It couldn’t hurt.

  “I’ll take one, then.”

  “Pleasure doing business. Five…no, four gold coins.”

  A bit expensive for a throwing weapon, but Goblin Slayer counted it out readily.

  He lined the brand-new coins up on the counter, and the old man took them without even pausing to ensure their quality.

  This young man, this single-minded goblin hunter, much preferred weapons like this to any legendary armaments.

  He had been a regular customer here for five years, and any shopkeeper who couldn’t figure out a customer’s preferences after that long would quickly be out of business.

  And he very much doubted this unusual man was the type to try to pay with counterfeit currency.

  “And scrolls. If you get any in, set them aside for me.” Goblin Slayer hung the fan-bladed knife behind him, from his belt. He tried drawing it several times, moving it around until it no longer bumped up against his item pack.

  The shopkeeper watched him with a satisfied expression and replied easily, “Sure, just like always. Don’t see too many of those, though. Anything else?”

  “Hmm.”

  Finally satisfied with the throwing weapon’s placement, something suddenly seemed to occur to Goblin Slayer.

  “…I wouldn’t mind some dried fish.”

  “I sell armor and weapons here. I’m not a fishmonger.”

  “I see.”

  The expressionless helmet tilted. The shopkeeper sighed.

  All these strange requests. Does he really understand…?

  “…If preserved is all right…I’ve got some.”

  “In that case, please deliver two or three barrels of them to the farm.”

  “Barrels? I told you, this ain’t the grocers.”

  But it came out as a mutter. The old man took out his order book, licked his pen, and wrote it down.

  §

  Finished with his shopping, Goblin Slayer left the armory with his usual unconcerned stride.

  He marched boldly to the Guild’s bulletin board, studying each new quest.

  All the other adventurers had chosen their quests already. The bulletin board was visible in places where pieces of paper had been removed.

  Dragon problem. Unexplored ruins. Ogre (what was that?). Gathering resources in the forest. A treasure hunt. A vampire in an old castle (he’d heard of such creatures). Exterminating rats in the sewers. Taking out a band of brigands.

  Periodically he saw words like Evil Sect, Dark Gods, demon slaying, and investigation.

  He searched from the upper right to the upper left, row by row, until he wound up at the lower left.

  He repeated this two or three times, then finally reached a conclusion.

  “…Nothing today.”

  This was unusual. Goblins could appear anywhere, at any time.

  He glanced toward the front desk, but saw no sign of Guild Girl.

  “…Hrm.”

  With the slightest of grunts, he headed for the desk anyway.

  His metal helmet swiveled left and right, until he spotted a Guild employee who seemed to have time to kill.

  “Hey.”

  “Wha—? Uh, ah!”

  The startled employee dropped the book she had been secretly reading behind her ledger.

  The employee—Inspector—picked up her book like nothing had happened and quickly put on a smile.

  “Ah, if it isn’t Goblin Slayer.”

  The eccentric adventurer was famous around the Guild in more ways than one.

  “Is this about yesterday’s quest? We have the reward ready to pay out…”

  “All right, then. Please divide it into two bags. Evenly.”

  “Certainly, sir.”

  “I would also like to make my detailed report.”

  “Ah… You can give it to me, if that’s all right…” Inspector hesitantly glanced at a back room of the office. “I hope she won’t hold it against me, though…”

  Goblin Slayer didn’t really understand what Inspector was muttering about.

  “You’re not assigned to me, so I might not understand everything. Would another day be all right?”

  “I don’t mind,” Goblin Slayer said with an indifferent nod. “But—is she okay?”

  “Oh, she’s fine.” Inspector lowered her voice to a whisper, clearly mindful of her surroundings, and smiled. “There’s a lot to take care of before you take time off. She’s had to be everywhere at once today.”

  “I see.”

  “Can I tell her Goblin Slayer was worried about her?”

  “I’m not worried.” But he didn’t exactly refuse, adding “I don’t mind” with a nod.

  Inspector’s smile broadened. He turned his helmet to indicate the bulletin board.

  “Goblins. None today?”

  “Goblin slaying? Just a moment, please.” Inspector vanished into the back room and returned with a leather pouch from a safe.

  She measured out the gold coins inside with a scale, then transferred them to two new bags.

  “Here you go.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Now, as for goblin slaying…”

  Goblin Slayer nonchalantly took the reward and tucked the two bags into his item pouch. While he did so, Inspector took out a register and thumbed through the pages.

  “Let’s see… You’re right. It appears there are no requests involving goblins today.”

  “Were there any that somebody else already took?”

  “No, sir. It doesn’t seem so for today.”

  “I see,” Goblin Slayer said with something like a low groan.

  “You seem disappointed.”

  “Yes.” Inspector had spoken lightheartedly, but Goblin Slayer nodded seriously. “Very
disappointed.”

  “Sorry I couldn’t help,” Inspector said, bewildered by his response. Goblin Slayer turned and walked away.

  Goblins were thieving, scheming creatures. Though they created crude weapons and tools, it never crossed their minds to make their own food or even their own dwellings. They survived by stealing what they needed…

  “…”

  …In other words, they were biding their time.

  Goblin Slayer grunted and shook his head. He glanced around the lobby as he gathered his thoughts.

  “Arrgh! My head feels like it’s gonna burst! And Guild Girl isn’t even here!”

  “Silly. It’s because, you drank, too much.”

  There was Spearman, holding his formerly addled head, and Witch, at it as usual.

  “Oh, hey, you’re back. Geez, how long does it take to buy one item?” Heavy Warrior said, resting his chin on his hands. Female Knight blushed furiously.

  “O-oh, hush. There are all kinds of things I have to consider…”

  Half-Elf Fighter jumped in playfully. “Well, even our beloved Knight wants to look stylish for the festival!”

  “Wow, really?! Aw, that’s great. I wonder if I should wear a dress or something, too,” Druid Girl said, cupping her cheeks with her hands. But Scout Boy quipped at her coldly.

  “You wanna look stylish, huh, Sis? …Well, you’re beautiful on the inside, at least.”

  “Wh-what did you say?!”

  “Hey, keep it down, don’t shout!”

  Heavy Warrior’s party was quite enamored with discussing the festival. Next to them, Rookie Warrior and Apprentice Priestess affected disinterest.

  “Are you just gonna stick to your votive robes? I was kind of hoping to see you in your ritual clothes…”

  “Watch it, or I’ll lay you out.”

  “Yeah, but I mean, it’s a festival…”

  “……W-well, I guess maybe I could…dress up a little…”

  “Really?! Woo!”

  “Hey, don’t make such a big deal about it, you’re embarrassing me!”

  The other adventurers were the same way. Everyone brimmed with excitement for the upcoming festivities. Not a single person wasn’t looking forward to it.

  “…Almost no one,” Goblin Slayer murmured within his helmet as his gaze met with an adventurer sitting in the corner. The young man wore a black overcoat, almost defiantly, and watched the adventurers with a glittering gaze.

  It wasn’t unusual. Ambition was necessary to succeed in this line of work.